If you are an expat thinking about starting a family in the UAE then these are a few pertinent questions you and your spouse together have to ponder over in order to make sure you both are ready to leap into parenthood.

1. How strong is your relationship?
Both of you must be strong in your relationship with each other to commit to perhaps 20 years together as parents. It’s a big question! Find out if you are ready for this commitment. Having child to repair a failing relationship hardly ever works.

2. Can you afford it?
Raising a child is expensive affair. Could you handle having two babies when you planned for only one? Managing your finances and deciding whether its better to wait and try to save, or just to go ahead and manage somehow. There is no right answer.

Besides, schooling is definitely a big expense here and the stress to get into the right school also is a bit intense. Nowhere else are kids moved around from school to school like here. And the fees are high.

3. Are you ready for the big change?
If you’re really enjoying life and have a great job and a full social life, a baby might change things for you drastically overnight. Are both of you prepared for this life altering change? Have you both the stamina for what might be a long haul?

What about health issues? — Some people decide to remain childless because they might potentially pass on some genetic condition. If this is you, take professional advice before committing yourself.
Getting pregnant is as difficult for some while it is easy for others. Be prepared for it may take time before it really happens. Don’t become anxious if it takes longer than you had hoped.

4. Is it pressure from parents and relatives?
Sometimes your parents’ desire to become grandparents is greater than your desire to be a parent. Don’t let their ambitions prejudice your own decision.

5. How will it affect your career plans?
As a father being a good dad will take a toll on your career especially during the initial few years. Will you be able to handle the pressure? And if you are a working mum then having a baby means taking maternity leave. Many couples also decide to then work part-time and share childcare responsibilities. How does all this fit with your career plan?

While the top five questions may pertain to any couple thinking of starting a family anywhere in the world there are a few questions you need to answer if you are thinking of starting a family in the UAE.

6. How will you cope without my family network?
Most couples feel the pressure of not having the usual family network of grandparents and relatives around you when you start a family in foreign land.

But if you have been living here for a while then you must have realized that friends can be a great support group. While nobody can quite replace family of course – and homesickness can certainly hit harder once you have a little one in tow things will naturally settle down in the long run.

Besides here house help is easy and economical to find and you can have groceries delivered to your doorstep, even at odd hours!

7. Are kids pampered more here than back home?
It all depends on your parenting and how they are taught to move around in a multi-cultural multi-lingual nation that embraces people from all over the world. Teaching your kids to be tolerant and inclusive, as a part of a multi-faceted society will make them better rounded citizens and residents rather than spoiled brats. It all comes down to parenting – which is challenging in any part of the world you may live in.

Will kids feel a lack of identity without citizenship?
Even if you child is born in the UAE, current laws mean they will not be a UAE citizen. Instead, their passport will likely be from your birth country which in some cases is a place they may never have lived. Where will home be for your kids? This phenomenon of raising so-called ‘Third Culture Kids’ also has its up-sides.

The upside is that with over 200 nationalities living in the UAE, your children will benefit from a multicultural environment and start learning Arabic from the day they start primary school, with many schools offering first-class facilities and good-quality international teachers.
In spite of not living in the country of which they are citizens, most kids do have a sense of patriotism for their motherland. This again depends on the parenting and the school that they go to. Most parents prefer to send their kids to schools which belong have links to their home country or teach their type of syllabus.

This also make the transition easier for the kids in case you have to move back home and put them in local schools.

Children who are born here and have lived for long in the UAE feel great sense of belonging to the country where most of their close family and friends also live. Thus third culture kids more often than not seem more ‘worldly wise’ and instills an interest to learn more about the world and different cultures.

How will the family cope in summer?
Depending on the climate of your birth country, summer is usually a time to get outdoors and enjoy the sprawling school holidays in the sunshine. But with temperatures during the summer regularly hovering around the 45-degree mark in the UAE and as such simply too hot to be outside.

A recent survey by Turner, a division of Time Warner called Kids Compass, found that children in the region spend nearly four and a half hours every day with technology.

As all schools are closed during summer many expats head home or to cooler climates.
But for those who have to spend the summer here for some reason or the other there are plenty of great camps in the summer in the UAE which are life-savers.

We are preprogrammed to want children. It’s nature at work. Having a family can make you feel you are doing what is natural. Try listing the pros and cons and balance instinct with the practical points you need to consider.

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  1. Alicia

    Very informative. Thanks for sharing.